My wife and I lead a marriage class at our church. It’s not a class for troubled marriages. It’s a marriage class for couples who believe in marriage, and for those who want to make their marriage the best it can be. I’ve seen and read ALOT of material on how to improve you marriage, but since I’m a guy, I can best speak to what hits home with me as a man and a husband of better than 19years.
So, here are THREE common things I’ve found all husbands can do to strengthen the bond with our wives:
1/LOVE HER. LOVE HER. LOVE HER. What your wife wants more than anything else in the world is to feel loved and appreciated. Remember when you were dating, and you took advantage of every opportunity to surprise her, appreciate her, and make her feel special? Guess what? She STILL wants that. That’s probably one of the big reasons she fell in love with you, so send her a card, even a text to tell her you are the luckiest guy in the world to have her. Then look for opportunities everyday to make her feel appreciated and valued.
2/LISTEN. LISTEN. LISTEN. Admittedly, this is one I have the hardest time with. Most men aren’t the best listeners in my experience. When we talk with our male friends, we talk over each other, we argue, we crack jokes. This is NOT how your wife enjoys talking to you. Just like I said above, she wants to feel valued. You can do that with your ears! Yes, God gave you two ears and just one mouth. So, ask her how her day was and be prepared to listen, listen, and listen some more. Don’t try to fix or remedy the situation. Just listen, understand, and empathize. Do this each and every day and watch how much closer you get.
3/SPEND TIME. SPEND TIME. SPEND TIME with her. It’s not about quality time. It’s about QUANTITY time. Yes, the AMOUNT of time you spend with your wife is SO important. When you put her above the game on TV, you show her that she’s the most important thing in your life. Try this discipline each day. Sit down with her for 20-30 minutes each day and hear her heart. Connect with her. Find out what’s going on in her world. Do that, and you’ll enrich yours.
BONUS: Do you know what your spouse’s “Love Language” is? Do you know yours? Take THIS SHORT QUIZ and have your spouse do the same and you can learn to love them the way that they really feel it!